Life can be hectic and schedules can become bogged down with things to do and it often leaves couples with very little time to converse with one another. Dating is easier to find time to spend with your significant other because sometimes, no one else is involved and the focus becomes the other person. After marriage, comes children and more responsibilities. This is not particularly a bad thing, it is just the next step in life. I'll share with you about my life and family and how I find time to "keep the spark."
I am a stay-at-home mother. Before this I was a Rural Carrier for United States Post Office and after we found out we were pregnant with our first daughter, Laura, we both sat down and agreed that I would stay home and that we had plans for more children. My primary reasoning for staying home with Miss Laura was because of nursing. Considering the cost of formula and the benefits of nursing, I nursed Laura until she was a little over 8 months (she started getting little teeth!). After Laura, I started getting baby fever and I didn't know if it was me or the Lord, so I spent a lot of time in prayer asking for guidance. As I prayed, I asked the Lord to take the desire away from me if it wasn't from Him, but that didn't happen, it only grew. After spending time in His Word and trying to hear that still, soft voice, I told my husband that I felt led to want to have another. Since I get teased about getting pregnant fast, we received the news just a couple weeks after that. We are now expecting our little Meredith on December the 10th of this year.
Between my husband working 6 days a week, 10 hour days, and 2 children with one on the way, time is tight when it comes to spousal time. [Now, don't confuse any of this for complaining because we are very blessed and grateful for the opportunity to have healthy pregnancies and babies while others are heartbroken with news that it's hard for them to reproduce.] To keep things fresh, we compliment one another daily, no matter where we are. I get either a call or a text every morning that says, "I love you, sexy" (funny, I know but that's how he is! lol) and I reply back with a similar text or response. Since I stay at home, one of the things that pleases him, is order and I like that. He comes from a country family with traditional values so his taste for good food is abundant and since I like to cook, it works well. Every man, who loves his wife, finds pleasure in the little things that she does. So as he comes home, the house is clean and there's a hot, homemade dinner waiting on him. He makes me feel good in return by telling me how good the food is and how blessed he is that he has a wife that can cook (granted, I grew up with the best cook who ever lived, my grandma!). In return of kindness and without being asked, he cleans up and even gets the kids ready for bed. Makes my heart so happy because I know he is tired, but he does it out of love and respect and that's the key: love and respect.
There are many things you can do to "keep the spark" and it can be as little as:
-Bringing lunch, snack, or dinner to your husband/boyfriend wherever he is.
-Calling to ask how his day is or sending a text that says "I miss you..."
-Men love to be complimented (that's how God made them, lol) so compliment daily to lift his spirits.
-Give plenty of hugs and kisses, especially when they are not expected.
-Never hold back affection or intimacy (talking to married couples on the last part lol)
-Hold hands, not just in public, but even in the privacy of your own home.
-Pray for them and let them know that you are.
There are so many things that you can do that can keep the fire going. It takes prayer, effort, and an honest love for that person. I will also tell you this and this is something that I always keep in the back of my mind: we can not love our significant other more than God. If we do, it is considered idolatry. I love my husband and children with all of my heart, but I know that my time and priorities have to be aligned with God's Will primarily. If you love God, He will give you all you need and then some. If you are single, don't rush the process. Focus on your relationship with Christ and He will, in His timing, send someone to you or even bring you to someone. If you are having spouts with your significant other, husband or wife, fix it. You are responsible for how you treat the other person. If you are spouting and are just dating, seek counsel or move on. May God bless you on this beautiful Fall day! Xoxo
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